I just came back from service. And as I stood the on the terraces, alot of memories came flooding back. Memory of my 3 friends. Memories of the times we had together as such good friends. The times where we would help each other out on booking seats. The times where I got scolded for not doing things right. The times where I brought you to church. The time where you responded to the altar call.

It was so happy, I learnt so much. Now when I turn my head, I see a shell of a group that was once thriving in revival. Guys, I miss you so badly. Why did you all throw in the towel? You didn't need to do it. I want to help u. But I can't reach you. I can't see you.

I hope for the best for you. Really. When I pray I would think abt you, and the circumstances you are in. Why did you have to do it, when it wasn't right at all, and u got urself into so much where u haven't had to do it in the first place. Does feelings really matter so much that one is willing to lay it all just for a moment of instant gratification? Does feelings matter so much that you are willing to dump God for it? To the reader, dun think so much about sexual immorality, its not. But let me ask you this.

What is love, when it fails at the moment of gratification? It weakens to a mutant of lust if u continue to live in it.

I love you, but I want to have my ice-cream first.
I love you, but clubbing on friday nights is a must.
I love you, but too tired to go to expo la.
I love you, but you are too strict on me.
I love you, but I rather spend time with my studies.


Love.. I believe in love. It's the fabric of my heart. And I really love you guys.

And today, I received news that I'll be transferring out to another cell. I think he knows it has been particularly hard for me. Everytime I look at the cell, I really wanted to cry. That's how I feel.

This is dedicated to you 6 guys and gals. I will never name you.

You six people have been one of the best people I've met, and I hope we will meet again next time.

I really need some time off to rest. My soul grieves day and night the moment u guys pop into my head. I wish I could just give up sometimes..

But I won't. I will NEVER. I know my God. I could never turn away..